Sorry, Man -- It Just Wasn't Working Out

Last August our washing machine broke down. It sputtered when it should have spun and it clanked when it should have cleaned, so off we went to shop for a new washer.

What fun.

Not.

I was perfectly satisfied to get another middle-of-the-line (well, lower middle-of-the-line) washer, but we'd heard so much hype about the new electronic, energy-saving front-loaders that we decided we just had to take a look. The more people (OK, sales people) we talked to, the more appealing the front-loaders seemed. They were definitely cute, with all their buttons and gizmos up front. And the energy-saving benefits couldn't be disputed. But were they good washers... and was this particular Kenmore machine (model #47512) a good washer?

"Weeelll," said Pam, the Very Sweet Sears Sales Woman, "Keep in mind that it is electronic, so when it breaks you can't just fix the mechanics. And because it's electronic, chances are it won't last as long as the mechanical washers. Which means, of course, that you'll want to get the extended warranty because electronic repairs are expensive."

What I should have said was "No thank you." But instead I begged, "Oooooh, tell me more!"

So she did.

"Weeell," said Pam, the Very Sweet Sears Sales Woman, "This machine has so many options! You can select a temperature and a wash cycle and you can even clean it by pressing this button."

I thought, 'Hmmmm... I can select a wash cycle and temperature with my old, cheap, mechanical washing machine, and why would a washing machine need to be cleaned???!"

What I should have said was "No thank you." But instead I begged, "Oooooh, tell me more!"

So she did.

"Within the first 5 minutes of beginning your load, you can add a garment by pressing this little red button. And if you want to spin a garment dry, just select rinse and spin. The number of available features is just astounding!"

I thought, 'Hmmmm... With my old cheap, mechanical washing machine I could add a garment any time during the wash cycle before the dirty water got sucked down the drain, and why would I want to get a garment wet again, rinsing it, in order to spin it dry?'

What I should have said was "No thank you." But instead I insisted, "Oooooh, say no more. We'll take it!"

Big mistake! For close to $1000 I got a washer that had all kinds of bells and whistles and buttons and gizmos, but wouldn't allow me to add a garment in the middle of the wash cycle and wouldn't just rinse... or just spin... or just frikkin' act like a basic simple ol' washing machine.

And the clincher? Hair and gunk gathered on the rubber boot just inside the door so that when I took out the wet laundry, it collected all the gunk again that had just been washed out!

On Saturday I went to Sears and found the Very Sweet Sears Sales Woman and told her that I wanted to like my new, expensive, electronic washing machine. Really I did. But I hated it and I wanted an normal ol' cheap mechanic washer that allowed me to add a garment, to just rinse or to just spin.

The Very Sweet Sears Sales Woman stayed sweet, insisting "Hon, you should be happy with your washing machine! Really, is there anything worse than a washing machine that makes you miserable?" ("Yes hon, there actually is..." I wanted to say. But instead I agreed, "Noooo! Really, it's just so saaaaaad!")

"You just go ahead a pick what you want," she said, "and we'll take care of it for you. Of course, I should mention that there will be a 15% re-stocking fee, another delivery fee..."

So here is my new cheap mechanical washer... and my cheap basic dryer! I got both for just $100 more than I spent on that fancy electronic front-loading energy (except emotional, of course)-saver gizmo!