Bummed

This whole job hunt thing is getting old. I need a vacation.

The one I wanted, the Director of Product Development at the family tabletop game company, got away. The other final candidate (geeze -- it always seems to come down to me and one other person) had extensive manufacturing and sourcing experience, which apparently trumps product design/management and content development experience. Huge sigh.

I'm disappointed. Really, really disappointed. I mean, managing product development for kids' media is what I DO. If I wasn't perfect for that position, what am I perfect for?

It's been a busy week and some interesting things have presented themselves, but as of today, my irons in the fire are feeling pretty cold.

I interviewed with a merchandizing agency on Wednesday, but it seems that they, too, want someone with sourcing experience (read: negotiations in China). Which is fine, actually. I didn't really want to make skins for PSP controllers anyway.

I got a call yesterday from a content development company and, although I absolutely loved the infectious enthusiasm of the product management director and of the CEO (with whom I spoke later in the day), the idea of writing technical documents for SQL server and Windows Live Media just doesn't fascinate me... although establishing strong client relationships and working with a team to bring a product from inception to completion, does. They want me to call when I return from Germany.

Yesterday evening, just moments after I submitted a bid to write the teen leadership curriculum for the really cool cultural exchange program (which would see me through till at least early 2008), I got an e-mail from my boss at Humongous Entertainment, with whom I designed the Blue's Clues games. He had an amazing business idea that I believe has real potential. I didn't even wait for him to describe the details; I jumped right in, begging to be part of it the minute I realized his plan! I'd love to work with him again. He's another real hold-out for kids' media, like me. We've both noticed that our professional educational media cohorts are slowly dwindling away, taking jobs in things like finance and web 2.0. But he and I are both adamant that we want to do the work we love, and that means creating engaging media that enhances a kids' day. And for me, at least, I don't want to be mired in endless and meaningless technical crap; I want to focus on the design of the kid's (or teen's) user experience. I want hands-on involvement with the content and the process, more than with the technology.

And of course, my dream job -- the Executive Director of the nonprofit childbirth education and doula foundation is still up in the air, and it looks like I might be taking part in a phone interview from Germany on that one! I know, I know -- they probably don't pay well at all. But you know... it's not all about the money. Yeah, I actually said that. I know -- I'm goin' soft. But there's something about that position that just really speaks to me...

It's all about the relationships, the team and the product. If I can be part of a strong team (preferably in a leadership role) and if I can nurture great relationships in the production of great (and meaningful) products or programs, I'm happy. Is that really too much to ask?!

But hey, tomorrow we'll wing our way across the globe to a land where I am NOT looking for employment (although some of the best kids' non-technical games come from Germany... hmmmmmmmm....!), and I am absolutely determined to put all my employment and career woes aside and immerse myself completely in the wonderful opportunities that this trip has to offer -- and if I would just pull myself out of these job-hunting-induced doldrums, I'd realize how numerous and fruitful those opportunities are.

But still. Big sigh.